Are dating sites the new norm?

 

Many people use massively dating sites to find their true soul mates but unfortunately fail to communicate from scratch and the relationships formed there most of the time have a time limit.

In the 21^st century the new hype is to have a relationship both in the cyber world, using internet apps to communicate such as facebook and instagram, but also interacting in the real world as well, but when you build your relationship by using an application to find your soulmate all the magic of a new acquaintance fails to exist and with it spontaneity, and the spur of the moment of the first gaze to the other person which happens to be in front of you in the right time at the right place.

Some might say we live in a busy world where time limits and the lost of mood for going outside might lead the search of a new relationship online, but relationships can be found anywhere when you leave your house in the morning by going to the subway, getting to the office or taking a jog outside the house and those relationships are more real and they can become permanent and long-term more easily and more naturally than those of an online app.

Things aren’t always as they seem to be, in the real world and especially in the internet. So why make things more complicated than they are by using an app (?). Long term relationships take time and take effort to be built, so people who want a match right now, right in this instance, in a minutes time without making an effort, are those who are willing to make a profile in an app and most of the times aren’t being honest about their true selves, so the relationships they will form are even toxic and fake in many levels.

When coronavirus was reaching the cities many used dating sites in quarantine but the most usage was made to spend time communicating with each other, sharing thoughts and not dye to the fact that they were expecting a serious relationship out of it.

The 21^st century’s norm pattern remains the old time classic norm pattern and not the virtual norm of forming relations with someone who says he is blond, clever and rich behind a computer screen and when eventually meeting him in real life you become aware that it was just an illusion.

Sometimes people prefer using an easy dating app but eventually they lose time and try to find the right match without being there in person so the outcome might be some illusions and misunderstandings about the real aspects of the other person’s character which shows in the computer screen from the early beginning.

People still go out at night and flirt, you can see it in every city in the world because it is more spontaneous and more fun, you will see the other person and feel his aura. How he talks, how he mingles with others and that promenades for you more than seeing a picture in your screen. Eventually you become more attractive even attached to him or her than you will ever do with someone who purposely uses a dating app because he desperately wants someone in his life.

There are factors that lead to having a healthy relationship online and offline. You should always be safe and interact with others in a safe environment where you won’t feel danger and anxious and as you know cyberspace can be a very dangerous place when you do not really know its rules… Many people have been hurt emotionally and in many other ways when being in the wrong online portal and meeting people who wanted to deceive them, you can see that in the news every now and then, there is always a story of a person using the internet in the wrong way and being deceived or even hurt emotionally or physically.

When you first make a relationship in the real world you will spend time to get to know the person better, to know his/her preferences, his ambitions, what he or she wants to have in life and that is healthy. When you meet someone online you will see what he supposing wants out of life in a few lines on your screen without seeing the expressions the person takes when talking to you about them. You save time but you lose moments and those moments are that count at the end of the day.

People who use online dating sites tend to be hurrying out to get to a relationship in the first place, so they willingly tend to not see some clues that will lead eventually to a brake up. They are willing to overcome barriers at the beginning but after a while some characteristics that they are facing to the other persons persona unfortunately do not seem to match most of the times the ones they are looking for in a relationship in the real world.

There is no right way or wrong way into making relationships, there is no way of knowing that a new relationship can last, no one can determine the length of a relationship, there are no predictions but when you meet your soulmate spontaneously out there in the real world you will feel the so called butterflies in your stomach as they say, so why not use real ones in real life instead of seeking to find virtual ones in a virtual world and cyberspace?

Long term relationships take time and effort and they can last if the persons in them are people who want the same things and have the right chemistry together, they cannot be the outcome of an internet dating site’s result for the time being. In the future nobody knows how relationships will be formed but my odds are that people will even then meet people in the real world, be spontaneous and live in the moment and not choose to be wired.